Night.

Hi Karma Journal. It's been a while. I'm back to it, now.

The Best:

I helped some students out with their work. I rubbed my husband's legs. He's detoxing from methadone. I initiated a step study on the JW Club.

The Worst:

I played with the JW Club site at work. I can't get enough of it.

Gratitude:

1. I'm grateful that my husband hasn't been too crazy yet while detoxing. I'm grateful he's not so miserable.
2. I'm grateful for my dogs.
3. I'm grateful for my family, both of biology and of choice.
4. I'm grateful for my pretty cat.
5. I'm grateful for my orange juice.

Night/Morning, Gratitude.

I'm up in the middle of the night. I had a bad dream.

The Best:

I went to a step meeting, and I've been doing a good job at my new job.

The Worst:

I've let my husband manipulate me to get his way a few times in order to keep the peace.

Gratitude:

1. I'm grateful for my husband's warm hand on my back right now.
2. I'm grateful for the women in my family.
3. I'm grateful for my doggies.
4. My girlfriends are wonderful.
5. I'm grateful for the tools I've gotten in Nar-Anon.

Night.

The Best:

I'm protecting my boundaries in several instances.

The Worst:

I'm conflicted about some of my husband's actions, and I'm not sure what I should do. Instead of being decisive, I'm doing nothing. I also lied at one of my jobs to get out of teaching too many classes. It was a lie of omission, but a lie nonetheless. I needed to drop some coursework to take care of myself...but I was wimpy about it.

Gratitude:

1. I'm so, so grateful that my husband cleaned the house.
2. I'm grateful that the little dog is going to have a good home, somehow.
3. I'm grateful for my new job. It's interesting, fulfilling work.
4. I'm grateful for my wonderful family.
5. I'm grateful for my evening without too much work to do.

Night. Gratitude.

It's been days. I was away with no internet.

The Best:

I have been away having a good time in support of a friend. I took care of myself and was present for an important event for someone else.

The Worst:

I said something insensitive about a behavior I didn't like in someone who had been kind to me. I gossiped about an old acquaintance and was judgmental of her choices.

Gratitude:

1. I'm glad to be back home, and my husband welcomed me surprisingly warmly.

2. I'm grateful for my dogs' warm paws.

3. I'm grateful for my beautiful friends, old and new.

4. I met a friend I've only known online, and it was great.

5. I'm grateful for the time I'm learning to spend talking to God.

6. I'm grateful for the hospitality and kindness of strangers.

Night. Gratitude.

The Best:

I have gotten myself well-prepared for class tomorrow, and I'm looking forward to teaching. I like being prepared.

The Worst:

I didn't get a lot of the things done that I wanted to do. I was kind of lazy and grumpy.

Gratitude:

1. I'm grateful for a good night's sleep in spite of being very upset yesterday.

2. I'm grateful for a good day with my husband.

3. I'm grateful for my family, who care about me and help me when bad things happen to me.

4. I'm grateful for my sponsor, who's called me a few times while I've been having a hard time.

5. I'm grateful that my husband doesn't seem to be fully relapsing, at least not yet.

Night. Gratitude.

The Best:

I spent a good day with my family.

The Worst:

I talked nastily about the boss who hurt my feelings with a co-worker. I shouldn't use bad words about someone even though she's hurt me.


Gratitude.

1. I'm grateful for my extra bedroom in my house.

2. I'm grateful for my friends who talk to me when times are hard.

3. I'm grateful for my cat and my dogs.

4. I'm grateful for the good food I ate today.

5. I'm grateful for my recovery. I'm not nearly so upset as I would have been before with all the things that are going on.

Gratitude. And Night.

The Best:

I stood up for myself when I heard some real bad news about my job, and I've handled it well today.

The Worst:

I told a lie to a family member. It was small and unimportant, but still a lie.

Gratitude.

1. I'm grateful for my family and friends.

2. Strawberries...I'm grateful for strawberries.

3. I'm grateful for the writing successes I've had lately.

4. I'm grateful for my beautiful, wonderful niece. She drove me nuts with her deep love for me today.

5. I'm grateful that my higher power is looking out for me in the strangest ways.

Gratitude.

I am so, so grateful for having the day that I've had. I have been barely tapping into the resource that is my spirituality, but I'm already reaping such a huge reward. I got a job interview for an exciting position coming up soon, prospects to write a new book that are very exciting, and a potential interview for a feature in a major magazine...all today. All without much work on my part...just taking care of myself and following my heart and doing what I need to be happy. Thank you, God, for giving me these amazing gifts.

I'm grateful for my support network and for the little coffee date we went on afterwards. It was wonderful to be with women friends.

God, please help me to know what I am supposed to do in the situation with my husband. It seems really unhealthy now, and I don't know how to fix it. Let me see what your will is for me in my marriage. I'm giving it up to you...please do with it what you will.

Gratitude.

1. I'm grateful for the new class I'll be teaching tomorrow. I'm excited!

2. I'm grateful for my big, clean bed.

3. I'm grateful for my friends who make me feel smart.

4. I'm grateful for my dinner.

5. I'm grateful for the new shirt I'm excited to wear tomorrow.

Gratitude.

1. I am grateful for my wonderful friends.

2. I am grateful to have gotten my work ready for class on Tuesday, more or less.

3. I am grateful for my family and their support.

4. I am grateful for the possibility of getting a cool scooter!

5. I am grateful for my warm husband and warm dogs.

Night. Gratitude.

The Best:

I went to my meeting. I spoke honestly about my life. I helped myself, and I hope I might have helped somebody else, too.

The Worst:

I gossiped about my husband. It wasn't productive.

Gratitude.

1. I am grateful for the support I've found in Nar-Anon.

2. I am grateful for my full belly and the delicious meal we ate.

3. I am grateful for our good night together and our sweet morning.

4. I am grateful for yoga.

5. I am grateful for my sweet niece and her funny voice.

Night. Gratitude.

The Best:

I taught a thorough, clear lesson this evening.

The Worst:

I was bossy with a friend when she called me with a problem.

Gratitude:

1. I am grateful that the battle that seemed inevitable between me and my husband was resolved rather reasonably.

2. I am grateful for the remarkable clarity I've had about my life in recent days. I'm wondering how I got so insane not to be able to see things so clearly.

3. I'm grateful to my students for making me laugh.

4. I'm grateful for my afternoon ride to get coffee. It was a beautiful day today with perfect weather.

5. I'm grateful for my wonderful, funny friends.

Night. Gratitude.

The Best:

I went to work and got a lot of things done, which is important for me to remember to do in hard times.

The Worst:

I helped my husband lie to his aunt, sort of...I sat there and didn't say anything, which was implicitly agreeing.

Gratitude:

1. I'm grateful that he went with me to yoga!

2. I'm grateful for the sweet card my mother sent to me.

3. I'm grateful for this warm bath and the bed that I'll be in soon.

4. I'm grateful to have had time to get my class prepared.

5. I'm grateful that things seem like they're still ok, at least for now.

Gratitude.

1. I am grateful for a nice day with my husband. We talked a lot, honestly, and it felt good.

2. I am grateful for the beautiful weather.

3. I am grateful for our sweet dogs and how much fun it was to watch them having fun.

4. I'm grateful for making love with him and the chemistry that never goes away.

5. I'm grateful for my mother.

Night. Gratitude.

My technical difficulties are over! I am quite happy to see my computer again, all fixed up.

The Best:

I have taken care of myself even though my husband is being a real addicty jerk. I'm glad to have been able to keep it together.

The Worst:

I accepted money from my mother for a problem I feel like I should have taken care of myself. She was glad to get it and I expressed my hesitation in accepting it, but I think that it was the wrong thing to do.

Gratitude:

1. I am so grateful to have a mother who wants to help me, even though I feel guilty for accepting her help.

2. I am grateful for my job. I got good news about it tonight...one of my jobs is going to give me enough hours so that I will qualify for benefits, which is really exciting.

3. I am grateful for the few good weeks I had with my husband before he started acting like a big, fat addict again.

4. I am grateful that I got a big household problem fixed.

5. I am grateful to have my computer back and be able to get back on track with my daily personal inventory.

Night, and Gratitude.

Computer issues kept me away and kept me from attempting to fulfill my re-newed commitment to my personal inventory. Sigh.

The Best:

I took good care of myself today...trying out a scooter that I might buy, resting, going to yoga...I had a good time with me! I also refused to lie for my husband.

The Worst:

I was grumpy with my husband this morning when he was reaching out to me.

Gratitude:

1. I'm grateful for the cool pink scooter that I tested today. Even if I don't buy it, testing it was fun!

2. I'm grateful for milkshakes in a balmy spring night with my husband.

3. I'm grateful for being able to make my mother laugh.

4. I'm grateful, so grateful, for finally feeling a bit more financially secure.

5. I'm grateful for my sore limbs from doing yoga, and I'm glad to be getting stronger.

Morning.

The Best:

I helped a few students with some writing issues, and I believe it will serve them well in the future.

The Worst:

I've been blowing off this blog for a few days now. I need to keep taking my daily inventory, and the gratitude lists are important, too. I've got to get my focus back.

Gratitude.

1. I'm grateful for my clean house and for having had the time to clean it.

2. I'm grateful for a warm bed with warm dogs and a husband who loves me.

3. I'm grateful that my husband seems to be making some good decisions some of the time, at least.

4. I'm grateful for finally feeling as if I can pay the bills without it being too much of a struggle. I prayed that God put something in my path to help me be able to pay my bills, and finally, I am able.

5. I'm grateful for my wonderful friends. I'd be lost without them.

Gratitude.

1. I'm grateful for the walk we took.

2. I'm glad for my husband's nice shaved head.

3. I'm grateful for my feet out of shoes.

4. I'm grateful that my class is finally coming together.

5. I'm grateful for payday!

Gratitude.

1. I'm grateful for a few pleasant moments with my husband at dinner tonight.

2. I'm grateful for the lovely breakfast we shared this morning.

3. I'm glad I had a few hours to myself this morning after he left to go work at his aunt's house. It's been a long time since I've had some time to myself.

4. I'm grateful for the phone call with my girlfriend this evening.

5. It was meeting night, and I love meeting night.